"Inside My Head "

I DID NOT write this post. I wish I could write something as powerful as this, but I cannot. I came across the post this morning and wanted others to have the opportunity to read it as well (this would be in the dream world were multitudes would have the opportunity to see this; however, I am very aware that virtually no no one reads what I post (which may be a good thing) except my mother and sister, which means I can write what I want (to some degree) knowing that I am relatively safe - I do not want any comments on this post - that will just drive me further downhill.

The title of the blog is "Inside My Head," and it is written by Mary Hess. I can relate to what she has written because I know that for a major portion of my life I have had to "hold on to myself" to try to keep myself together - afraid that if I "let go," I may not be able to "put the pieces back together again." It takes a lot of energy to hold one's self together for years on end, and sometimes I am not sure if I can continue to do it. I have been on a downward spiral since returning from my trip this summer to where I live. I am finding it more and more difficult to "hold myself together" at work (and other places as well) - things are frustrating me to the point that I feel I may just "explode" though I will continue to try not to do this. I should probably
retire; however, that is not an option.

I too read a book a number of years ago that helped me when I had my first semi-serious bout with depression - I have been plagued with problem since my early teens - maybe even before that. The book was by Tim LaHay entitled How to Win Over Depression. Mind-thought were certainly a part of my problem since I replayed things over and over in my head, which only made things worse. After reading the book, I made an agreement with myself that when these thought came, I would give myself a few second to feel sorry for myself, and then push the thought aside and move on. I was successful to a significant degree using this technique; however, I have had some major depressions since then, unfortunately.

Please read what Mary has to say. You may not need this information for yourself, but it may help you to assist someone else.

Carolyn


Inside My Head (http//networkedblogs.com/p14588702)
Stressed

Phil. 4:8,9 - Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - I will think on these things.
Ephesians 4:23, 24 - I will be made new in the attitude of my mind. And I will put on my new self created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.


You know, so many of us - well, let’s be honest - ALL of us battle something in our minds -insecurities, trust issues, lust, lying, fear, negativity, depression - you name it, I bet we have each battled one, if not more of these things. And I’m sure I’m leaving the list way too short.

A few years ago, God really changed my life. It’s too much to type here but suffice it to say that the enemy had major control of my mind - to the point that I felt like I was going insane. How’s that for being real? ;) A friend of mine introduced me to a wonderful book by Joyce Meyer called The Battlefield of The Mind and I read it. And quite honestly, the book ticked me off. How dare someone tell me that I had control of my thought life? She obviously didn’t know what she was talking about. But the more I read, the more I saw that Joyce had been exactly where I was. And she did know what she was talking about.

It took a lot for me to push through my urges to make excuses as to why I couldn’t possibly get control of my own thought life - and a lot of prayer from close friends and my wonderful husband who had to endure a lot of attacks from the enemy - through me - because of the battle I was going through. But God’s grace prevailed. And so I chose - look at that word - I chose to change. I wrote down scriptures dealing with our minds and memorized them.

Every time a thought would come over me that wasn’t supposed to be there, I would say my scriptures out loud. I would sing songs - even if I had to make them up - that would lift up Jesus. I would choose to respond positively and not negatively. I kept myself accountable to my husband and to a few close friends. They would keep me in check if I started going down the wrong road again.

I hated having to do so much work to become free from this negative thought pattern. While I hated it, I loved it. Being broken and admitting there was so much junk in my life wasn’t fun. But it was necessary. And I’m thankful I did it. Many, many days all I could do was say, “Jesus, please give me strength to do this.”

You see, we live in a time where people expect to get everything quickly. We forget that some things we really have to work for. When you work for something, chances are you appreciate the end results even more than if it was just handed to you, right? God knows that about us of course! He created us! So, there are times in our Christian walk we have to push through on purpose to get the victory in a battle. And it isn’t easy. And there will be battle wounds - wounds that turn into scars. But those scars will definitely remind us where we came from and help us to toughen up for the next battle!

So I encourage you today to take inventory of your thought life. Are there things you allow to dwell there that aren’t pleasing to God? There’s a saying I’ve heard my entire life: “You can’t stop a bird from flying over your head, but you sure can keep it from building a nest in your hair.”

While that sounds silly, it’s very applicable to what I’m talking about today. I can’t stop a thought from going through my mind, but I sure can keep myself from dwelling on it. The enemy places the thought there and then waits to watch for your reaction to it. If he continually sees you reacting the opposite of that thought he’ll move on to some other tactic.

Even today, I still have times where it will try and trip me up again. I haven’t reached perfection in this area of my life. But I make sure to keep quoting those scriptures (I carry index cards in my purse with them written on it), sing those songs, pray those prayers and hold myself accountable to those I’ve entrusted with my life. Together we make a GREAT army for God! And we need each other!

Here are a few scriptures (taken from NIV) that I have used to help me. I’ve tweaked them a bit to be more personal but the overall theme is there. I hope they help you as much as they have me.

Ephesians 4:23, 24 - I will be made new in the attitude of my mind. And I will put on my new self created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Isaiah 26:3 - You will keep me in perfect peace because my mind is steadfast and I trust in You.

I Corinthians 2:16b - I have the mind of Christ.

Romans 12:2 - I will not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but I will be transformed by the renewing of my mind.

I Peter 1:13 - I will prepare my mind for action. I will be self-controlled. I will set my hope fully on the grace to be given to me when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Phil. 4:8,9 - Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - I will think on these things.

I Peter 5:8, 9 - I will be self-controlled and alert - the enemy prowls around like a roaring lion looking to devour me. I will resist him and stand firm in the faith.

I Corinthians 14:15 - So what shall I do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will also pray with my mind. I will sing with my spirit, but I will also sing with my mind.

Ephesians 6:12 - My struggle is not against flesh and blood but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers to this dark world and against spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

II Corinthians 10:4, 5 - The weapons I fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. I demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God . . . and I take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

About the author of this "posted post"-
Hess,Mary - Mary Hess is a thirty-something mom to 2 beautiful girls (13 & 2) and wife to an amazing man! She has been involved in ministry for most of her life teaching, leading worship and serving wherever needed. She and her husband own Purses and Such and have been enjoying learning how to run a successful business of their own. Her most recent adventure has been to re-enroll in college to finish her degree in Psychology: Christian Counseling. Hopefully by the time her youngest daughter is in school she will have her Masters Degree and be on her way to completing her doctorate. While all of these things are important to her, Mary stresses that her main purpose in life is simply to pursue God. Wherever He takes her and whatever He wants her to do is her ultimate desire.

Blessings to all - Carolyn